Obligated Love

I have previously blogged about this topic in my other blog site; the blog site which I’ve deleted it off permanently as someone hacked into my account, somehow. Thank you, 88. I now have to start building it all over (since few months back).

Anyway, back to my topic.

Even though I am not an expert with ‘love’, but I just want to say a few points about it. My thoughts, at least.

Yes, I would say there are couples out there had misinterpreted the real meaning of ‘love’.

There are couples who have been dating for the umpteen years (they probably started very young – high school sweethearts, maybe?), and up till today they still remain as an item. I always wonder how they did it so successfully. How on earth did they keep the flame between them burning?

Here are several important elements that a couple should remind themselves with, in order to have a healthy relationship and also help to sustain one.

Firstly, communication is an important element in a relationship. The couple keeps the relationship going with having new topics to keep the conversation between them going. Endless chats and interesting conversation is definitely a big factor to keep it going strong. What is a relationship and how can it sustain when there is no communication? It will be just really weird to see a couple taking a drive in the same car with no talking or laughter throughout the whole journey or during a meal together, isn’t it?

Secondly is the couple doesn’t take each other for granted. As the saying goes, “familiarity breeds contempt”. In this case, once a couple is familiar and have adapted to each other’s character and style, some might just take the other for granted. Say for example, the guy will not accompany the girl for shopping, as compared to the initial stage of grabbing on tight to her hand and waist, walking in to each and every shop in the mall; from store front to outside of the changing room. Hmm.. I wonder at times if there are times that the guy would like to accompany her to the ladies as well, so that she won’t be out of his sight even for 2 minutes? Girls may probably nag at their partners when they wanted to catch a football match with buddies as compared to watching it together (killing two birds with one stone by spending quality time while watching the game)?

The third element is trust and open conversation. The presence of trust is very important in a relationship. What is the point to stay together and even start a family together when one party keeps on suspecting on the other? If there is nothing to hide, I don’t see the reason why someone should send text messages under the table or make phone calls in the toilet. Open conversation will only clear any misunderstandings from stirring up.

When a couple has been dating for a long time, somehow the love might have turned into obligated love. The love they share is no longer the sensual, tingling feeling but just the obligation to stay together. Being together just for the sake of being together. Their love have faded and slowly turning cold. There are some reasons why some couples would opt to stay with each other despite the depreciated love. One of them is because the couple has reached certain age and just got too lazy to start all over the courting “procedures” and go through the courtship period from scratch……Another would be because of the family factor. The parents like either the girl or vice versa...

There won’t be any outcome if a couple (or even just one party) has the “obligated” feeling. There will not be a future.

All the best to all couples! I pray that you are truly happy.

Cheers!