Confused Thoughts

(This is a very personal blog entry. I’ve decided to pour it all out here)

I vented out my frustrations at the gym this morning. I was working and sweating it all out. There were too many mind-bothering issues running through my mind…..

Here are my deep thoughts of the day.

I am in a decision making stage. A decision to either make or break. A decision that will determine pretty much my career future.

You see, the thing is I was offered with a job. I like and am very interested with the job scope and I think I am able to handle it as I have previously done and have experience in some of the tasks. However, the only setback is that I still don’t know about the renumeration package and also where will I be located. I am not demanding for the moon or the sky, but just an amount for me to consider; plan and make adjustments (if needed).

I know I am flexible with the relocation but I still need to know the location as I have to arrange and prepare myself – mentally; and also to inform my parents on my whereabouts. This offer will be able to train me to be a tougher person and able to gain new experiences. Doing sales is not easy as it is mainly selling, but of course, it involves building relationships, problems solving and trained to be a fast thinker. This job also have some marketing elements in it.

I did reflect back on my past jobs over the years. I did realize that my plans for my career weren’t exactly great. I should have started off by having some sales background as it would be able to expose me in the rough-and-tough society and people handling. After gaining that experience, I move on to the major that I have studied for – marketing. I was younger back then and it would be definitely be a good training ground for me and great to be around any city or cow-boy town to gain experience and exposure. It would have been perfect if I could turn back time....

Maybe my ‘prayer’ is now being answered; as I wanted to be tougher.

Maybe God thinks I am ready for a new challenge and his has planned something for me. Maybe now is the right time to do it…?

I think I am confused and am not quite sure about it (no figure,no location). There are questions in me which no answers were given. I am contemplating. I am considering it. How am I to commit myself even before knowing where will I be sent to and if the amount offered is sufficient? I have my commitments and bills to pay. Will you if you were in my shoes?

My future will be very bright if I join and am able to sustain in this company. I know it is a risk, on either the good side or a down fall……….. to step my feet in, before any black & white is given.

What should I do now? My thoughts are just clouded...