Expectation too high and Stupidity?

It was rather a frustrating day for me today. We had our monthly sales meeting. We had to present the upcoming event to the sales team.

I got the project leader to present the updates and before I passed her the projector cable, I asked her what was she going to show on screen. She answered me rudely and there wasn't any respect at all! Hello..!!! I didn't ask in a harsh way (if you know me, I never speak harshly to my colleagues or team members). What the F*cK!! What more I am her manager!?! Don't I have the right to check before hand?

2nd incident happened just right before we left office. I was the 3rd last person to leave for the day. I informed her that we need to apply for our guest artists' Performance Visa and she answered back loudly: "Who do?" Arghhhh, I was really boiling at the moment. Did she just expect me to do it? I just can't comprehend why can't she just complete the project in a proper manner even though she has resigned? I respect her as a senior; experienced person, but someone can just have no sense of responsibility; stewardship and ownership!

So what you have resigned?! I don't care. I just want the job to be completed and executed with excellence. If you don't have the time to do it, brief the marketing assistant, the marketing assistant will be able to help.

Am I expecting too much or am I just being reasonable here? Be fair to others, be fair to me. Should I be more nasty and not requesting them to do the work in a nice tone, polite manner? Should I just order them to do the job?! I feel like being nice is just plain stupidity and being stepped all over. Did I do wrong?